Monday, January 12, 2009

To be present.......

You know, we all do it. We make New Year's resolutions, only to have failed by the 2nd week in January!

Why? Why would we subject ourselves to such hurt when we know that we have such potential to fail?

After assessing some areas in my life, I realized that I was not going to fall for the same ole' trap again.......I was gonna make some resolutions, but they would be private. That way if I fail, you would never know!!

I am smart like that!!

But for some reason, here I am fixin' to pour my heart out to ya'll........again!

There is one area that I would like to be vocal about.

I want to say this so that if you know me you can correct me when I mess up.

My goal for 2009..........................................

drumroll please............................................

Is to be "present".

It may sound super simple, but it's not.

Let me explain exactly what I mean. You know when you are having a conversation with someone and you are making eye contact and hear the words coming out of their mouth?


You are not really hearing them?

I want to try really hard to hear everyone. Please know that I haven't been ignoring any of you (the people who know me IRL), but there are times when my plate is so full that I am thinking of a thousand other things when I owe you my undivided attention. For this, I am truly sorry. You deserve better than that, and I have often fallen short when it comes to being present for you.

I realize that I do this more often than I care to really admit. I do it with my kids, my husband, my friends........heck, I even do it with the TV!!

To the actors and production crew of Prison Break, ER, House and CSI,

I am truly sorry for not devoting the whole hour to you when you are a top notch show and your writers work really hard to entertain me!! I will promise to be totally enveloped in your show when it is on......I may be as big as a house for sitting on the couch watching all of these shows, but at least I am going to be faithful and watch your show how you intended. Sorry for all of the episodes that I have DVR'd and erased. I will be better, I promise.

A woman who wants to be "present"

Okay, now that little job is finished, but in all seriousness, I long to have total focus on a situation. I want to know and truly be part of all areas of my life. That is my goal for 2009.

I want to remember all of the good times that I share with everyone. Life is short. Stuff can wait. Embrace the here and doesn't stay this way forever.

Thank you for following my blog and if you know me and I seem distracted.......remind me to keep my focus!